The Practice of Non-Judgment

Each week we teach our students a character building word. When we do this we remind them that these ideas are to practice. They're ideas to try out and see what happens.

Non-judgment is definitely one of those character building words that requires practice. Practicing non-judgment means we no longer judge others OR ourselves.

A great concept and tall order to fill because judging is a part of being human. We can credit our egos for this instinct. We don't begin each morning say "I'm going to judge everyone I see today", but we instinctively do it none the less. Our egos look for what is wrong or different. We judge what other people wear, what they say, how they look, how they drive, how they spend their time or not spend their time. We judge strangers, new people we meet and our own family. The biggest victim of our judgments - ourselves. We often don't even recognize that we are doing it but for most of us it begins the moment we wake up and look in the mirror. We judge our bodies. We judge how we look, how we don't look. We judge what we say or don't say, what we do or don't do, how much money we spend or don't spend and what we have or don't have. We call ourselves names like dumb, lazy, fat and ugly. These harsh words are not healthy for our bodies.

The key for practicing non-judgment begins with becoming aware that we are doing it. This is the practice. Usually the awareness occurs after the judgment has happened. If I recognize I have been judging someone there are several things I might do: 1) try to think of one thing about them I like, 2) I'll send them a blessing in my mind, 3) think of them as a child or 4) (this one takes extra work) look at where the judgment comes from within me and practice forgiveness. By becoming aware of the judgments we can then begin to change how we treat ourselves and others. Remember judgments typically come from a belief that someone or something (a situation, a characteristic, parts of our body, etc) should be different than the way it is. When we are aware of the judgments as a belief we have made up and can practice acceptance, compassion and forgiveness we empower ourselves to live happy and peaceful lives.

Ways to pracice non-judgment:

• Practice acceptance with yourself, others and situations
  
• Practice compassion (you never know why someone could be in a bad mood)
• Practice forgiveness
• Look in the mirror and tell yourself you love your SELF, especially love the parts you're not as fond of